D3MONS

OK so what’s happened since the last time I posted?  I have no idea, I’ll go read the last thing I posted… back in a few…

OK right- the ritalin.  yeah, that was a long time ago..  I went to dinner, it was fine.  But weird.  A long time ago, that was… a year and a half ago, in fact.

So, what’s happened in the last year and a half?  Let’s see…. I started fucking this insanely hot blond chick basically immediately after my girlfriend and I split up.  Which was about three weeks after I last posted.  We spent a lot of time together and fucked each some but.. then we stopped fucking each other, and we’re still friends.

OK, I’m gonna go do some thingelse now, I’m bored. back in a few…

ok back.  I just re-read part of what I wrote last:

I think I’m going to try to go for pizza tonight or something, so we can go back to the bar afterwards… something where I can nurse one or two beers, or get a real drink, and she can get a couple real drinks too, so she forgets how fucked up I am.

Wow. Pretty telling of how my life was going at that point in time.  I think I’m gonna write to her, just to say Hi.  Or, maybe not.  Maybe I’ll wait until I’m full-sober.

I was kidding about the thingelse, of course.  I don’t think I’ve done ritalin since though.  Or maybe I have, not really sure.  But pretty sure I haven’t.

This is stupid.  I can’t admit to myself what I’ve become.  OK sometimes I admit it, but.. even when I do, it doesn’t take.  I suppose that at least I know I’m not as much of an alcoholic as I was when I was dating that girl. Which I know, because I don’t ever feel the need to drink in the morning, I don’t ever look at the beers in the store in the morning and really want one.  Or maybe I’m more of an alcoholic, and I’m living it both wet and dry, alternatingly.  Whatever.

Here’s another story: I was closing the bar with.. OK this is bullshit, I need to come up with some names for these humans in my real life that I write about here, occasionally.

OK, done.  Here are some of the names you’ll be reading about: jason, cheryl, lucy, jared, john, candice, matt, jeff, joe, denise, sal, minnie.  Fortunately I have a spreadsheet.  I’m jason.

OK so here’s the story:  I was hanging out at the bar with jenny.  It was closing time.  Jenny’s ex, Jared called me up to see if I was gonna go to this after hours place we’d been to once before.

You know what?  Fuck this, I’m gonna sign off for the night.