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not so much

so I did end up going to the bar last night, as I said I was going to.  I had an OK time- not great, not bad, but OK.  I had an opportunity to take a girl out of there with me, but I wasn’t ready to take a girl home, and I wasn’t exactly particularly attracted to her, and thus I didn’t make any special effort to be the one that fucked her tonight, so I bored her, and she disappeared.  I seem to have a talent for that, somehow.  So much of the time, I feel like I really have nothing to talk about, and then end up completely dominating conversations.  But, I guess that’s my winning personality.

I don’t really know how much I had to drink- I reckon probably around seven or eight Guinness.

I realized this afternoon that I need to stop going to bars to talk to girls- the likelihood that I would meet a girl in my local, or another bar I might be in, and want to build a relationship with her is terribly low.  Really I need to stop drinking so much.  It’s so hard to stop drinking though- I didn’t do shit all day because I slept on my bathroom floor, which evidently needs cleaning, since it’s a lot dustier when you get down around zero inches from the floor.  I don’t know, I hate this whole thing so much.  This.. everything.  I want my old life back.

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